There is an unexpected grief I have been introduced to. Grieving the loss of who I used to be. My daughter died. I am different now. I am not the same person. How could I be? There is a need to fix things once you have been broken. Glue all the pieces back together. Maybe throw… Continue reading The Unexpected Grief
It has been 7 months. We should have been celebrating Cora’s first Halloween and picking out cute costume(s) for her to wear. Instead, I packed up all of her clothes in the nursery. It was a very emotional and heart wrenching thing to do. I kept them out in case we were having another girl… Continue reading Month 7: Packing up.
This is fun. This is fun. This is fuuun?? That is what I keep trying to tell myself. Pregnancy is supposed to be fun. Exciting. Thrilling. Beautiful. Well, pregnancy after loss is not so fun. Don’t get me wrong, I am not complaining about being pregnant. I am complaining about the feelings that come with being pregnant… Continue reading 18 Week Update: This is fun?
A conversation I’ve thought of over and over again occurred before Paul & I drove back up to the hospital to be induced. We had been wondering around the house, in shock, trying to process what was about to happen. I was sitting on the edge of our couch, both of us were in tears… Continue reading Month 6: Have Courage & Be Kind (Cora’s Rules)
It seems now a days, we have “days” and “months” for everything. Some of my favorites are National Cat Day, Margarita Day, Cookie Day, Pancake Day…really anything that involves unhealthy eating/drinking habits or cats. To the majority of America, October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. It was started in 1985 but I suspect it did… Continue reading October: No longer just the “pink” month.
It has been four months since our Cora joined the angels in Heaven. I have had a lot of time to reflect on many things these past 4 months but I keep coming back to our community. Our “tribe” if you will. I have had many people tell me that they do not know… Continue reading Month Four: Our tribe
Very soon after we lost Cora, someone whispered to me “guard your marriage”. I have no clue who said this to me but I distinctly remember hearing it. I was unsure what they meant and even a little hurt that someone would suggest I could lose my marriage after losing our daughter. But then the… Continue reading Month Three: Our Marriage